Random Notes

The blogger's best friend, a "random notes" column:

1. I have just started the Game of Thrones series of books, on the recommendation of Mrs. VegLaw. I know -- plot, right? -- but watching a few episodes of the HBO series helps in identifying characters in the early pages of Book the First.

2. Just Listed: 210 Briaridge Drive in Wilkins Twp. $137,900.

3. Taking broker's prep classes at CBHQ. Eligibility for the broker's license in Pa. is on a points system. To take the test, a candidate needs to amass 200 points, 1 point per listing, 5 per sale, and on and on. Candidates are urged to "chart" their sales and listing activity contemporaneously, not extemporaneously.

4. The Pa. Supreme Court (SCOPA) recently ruled that a pulpwood company’s sale of its Delaware land constitutes taxable business income in the state. Glatfelter Pulpwood v. Commonwealth, Board of Finance and Revenue.

To be continued ...

Pa. Supreme Court Declines Business Privilege Tax in Shelly Funeral Home

Pa. Supreme Court Declines Business Privilege Tax in Shelly Funeral Home

By Charles McWittig

Pennsylvania local governments looking to tax "big business" to keep out of the red will have to look elsewhere.

The state Supreme Court, in an opinion released a week before Christmas, played Grinch to local pols by declining a business privilege tax in Shelly Funeral Home v. Warrington Township. The $2,600 annual business privilege tax in this case applied to all businesses in the township with gross receipts over $1,000,000, and exempted from liability all businesses with gross receipts of $1,000,000 or less.

The township imposed the tax in 2009 in order to close a $400,000 budget deficit. The feds would have laughed off this amount as a tip in Vegas on a slow Wednesday night, but for local governments that actually provide services, it means something will go undone.

Shelly Funeral Home and 27 other Warrington Township businesses challenged the tax on the basis that it violated violated Section 533(a) of the Local Tax Reform Act, which prohibits political subdivisions from taxes "on gross receipts or part thereof."

The township defended the tax on the basis it was a flat tax, which would have been legal. The township, however, refused to impose a flat tax because it would have impacted smaller businesses disproportionately. The $1 million threshold was not arbitrary, but rather the result of a study by the township prior to enacting the tax.

The court decided that a flat tax based on a threshold amount amounts to a tax "on gross receipts or part thereof," proving once again that these things come down to the tiniest words.

The Court did not address all similar business privilege taxes. Ironically, a business privilege  tax "subject to a very modest gross-earnings threshold predicated on a business’s ability to pay the tax" may have passed the smell test. But since the township went to the trouble of figuring out exactly how much it would need to close its budget deficit, and set the bar at an amount that pinched "big box" retailers and others so called big businesses, it didn't.

Shelly Funeral Homes, et al, Aplts v. Warrington Twp., et al 

Bank of America Short Sale - The Nightmare Continues

You can't help but wonder, after an experience like this, where the housing market is headed.

An underwater client who doesn't want to move from her house. Buyers who do want to move, into client's house. A Bank of America mortgage. Two junior mortgages totalling about $60,000. A rock wall 20 feet from the exterior rear - it looks like it's sprouting trees frozen in mid-fall, poised to crush the roof. This fact alone kept buyers looking elsewhere for the better part of two years, during which time client made not one single payment to our friends at BoA. Not only is the buyer who found this attractive a cop, he and his wife are also readers, bane of the selling agent's existence.

A parade of potential buyers trekked through the house during the active listing period. Client's possession of a Rottweiler - a charge bestowed upon her by a feckless employee of the restaurant in which she works - required that someone be present to give selling agents access. Usually, that was the listing agent, driving across town some 45 minutes. Bank of America offered client an expedited, cooperative short sale which has turned out to be neither. 

I could go into the litany of documents and e-mails (45 of the latter) that went to and fro in this monumental cluster f*** of a deal, but I won't. Every e-mail demanded a document or presented some impossible deadline. The early days of the journey down the rabbit hole that is BoA's Equator collection system were mired in repeated requests for "listing documents," all of which Equator already possessed. Neither buyer nor seller have "scan and send" capabilities, so every request resulted in in-person visits on both sides.

Finally, the parties put the house under agreement and agreed on what to do about the inspections, nothing out of the ordinary for R.E. Then BofA proceeded to sit on the deal for FOUR MONTHS!

Needless to say, the buyers, who had closed on the sale of their home after their own (brief) delay, got antsy. And at least one of them is licensed to carry a firearm.

During the four month waiting period, BofA brought out some serious Orwellian hardware, in the form of requests for documents that didn't exist and had to be created out of thin air (necessitating more trips back and forth), multiple requests, weeks apart, for the same document, outright lies, and, ultimately, rejection of the deal. The reason: requested listing document not provided within 14 days. Upon follow up, BofA could not identify this document, nor could they inform anybody as to when the 14 days started to run, if this was indeed a deadline.

After frantic pleas for assistance and information by their agent, the buyers walked. Not surprisingly.

If this debacle is typical of today's short sale, underwater homeowners would seriously be better off (as an agent it pains me to write this) staying put, and waiting for foreclosure. Which may not come. But if it does, under Pennsylvania law the borrower can stay in the house for 18 months. That does not include the time she buys fighting the robo-signature. Bonus!

Alternately, walking away from the house makes good sense, if the borrower can afford to do this. I would not advocate a deed in lieu of foreclosure, since, again, you would have to deal with our friends at Bank of America.

So Is It OK To Eat at Taco Bell?

Taco Bell has long been a staple of the vegetarian who craves fast food. The Yum! Brands chain has at least two burritos that I'm aware of (7 Layer and Cheesy Bean and Rice) that are veg-friendly, and surprisingly edible. Now, however, Taco Bell must fight a class action lawsuit alleging that what it calls beef does not contain enough cow to live up to the name.

Like all good corporations, Taco Bell immediately went to the mattresses, firing a PR broadside with its lounge act commercial promising "four times the steak" in a new product. It's an entertaining commercial, and it should be viewed as nothing less than the chain's attempt to win the battle in the courtroom of public opinion.

I don't eat meat, so it will not affect me or any other vegetarian if Taco Bell is forced by judicial fiat to up its beef content; however, this lawsuit really is an attack on all fast food joints. If Taco Bell's meat doesn't have enough meat, what does that say about McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, even In-and-Out Burger? Is a Mickey D's double cheeseburger mostly filler? How about a Burger King chicken sandwich? A Wendy's triple? A BK Quad Stacker?

In Fast Food Nation, Eric Schlosser deconstructs the American fast food burger to its chopped and processed inception. He demonstrates that the flavor and aroma that carnivores crave can be produced by a chemist. The plaintiffs in the Taco Bell lawsuit do not seek monetary damages (good thing, since they wouldn't be entitled to any in any scenario short of actual poisoning), they merely seek a court order that the chain employ truth in advertising. I doubt a huge chain like Yum! will cave on this issue.

I don't know. The lounge act commercial just wouldn't have the same ring if the lyrics were "four times the meatlike substance stretched with soy filler," as much as I love meatless soy crumbles. We shall see. It should be an interesting trial, with flavorists and meat-makers from both sides testifying at length about what compromises fast food meat. This can only have a positive impact on our health as U.S. consumers.


MORE MOVIES

I promised a list of my favorite movies, and here are ten more that have stuck with me:

11. Silence of the Lambs – Chilling screen adaptation of the Thomas Harris novel which I never read, this film spurred me to read and then watch both “Hannibal” and “Red Dragon.”. So memorable it actually spawned a sequel and two prequels (the second was “Hannibal Rising”). Starring Anthony Hopkins as a jailed, cannibalistic serial killer and Jodie Foster as the FBI trainee charged with interviewing him.

                                             

12. Fight Club – An insomniac white collar yuppie, fed up with materialism and hypocrisy in post modern America, meets a free spirit on a plane and the two form an underground, bare-knuckle boxing club. And then it gets weird. Directed by David Fincher. Starring Edward Norton and Brad Pitt.

13. Boogie Nights – Paul Thomas Anderson’s film about the Southern California porn industry in the late 1970s and early 1980s. Anderson has not made a better film yet and that includes “Magnolia” and “There Will Be Blood.” Starring Mark Wahlberg, Julianne Moore, Burt Reynolds, Heather Graham, John C. Reilly.

14. Citizen Kane – Generally cited as the greatest film of all time. Even the DVD bonus feature about the making of “Kane” is fascinating. Orson Welles’ documentary-style chronicle about the life of Charles Foster Kane, a thinly-veiled William Randolph Hearst. Film has since been universally praised, but it caused the downfall of Welles, who portrays Kane, when the real-life Hearst trashes him.

15. A Clockwork Orange – Stanley Kubrick’s masterpiece about youth gangs was far ahead of its’ time in its’ portrayal of ultraviolence. The gang leader (in the book he is 15 years old) is arrested for murder and then reprogrammed by the state. The iconic image of Alex brandishing a knife is instantly recognizable to this day.

16. Pulp Fiction – Quentin Tarantino’s collection of narrative-bending, interconnected crime stories. Starring John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson, Uma Thurman.

17. Miller’s Crossing – Underrated Coen Brothers film about Prohibition era gang bosses warring over turf, and the men who whisper in their ears. This is a great film with many trademark Coen quirks. Starring Gabriel Byrne and Marcia Gay Harden.

18. Love and Death – The best and funniest Woody Allen film. A Russian poet and his wife (played by Diane Keaton) try to assassinate Napoleon. Based on War and Peace but also invoking Spinoza, Bergman and T.S. Eliot, among others.

19. Pan’s Labyrinth – Guillermo del Toro’s brilliant film is half-fantasy, half hard reality. During the Spanish Civil War, a young girl pursues an active but dangerous fantasy life as her stepfather, a tyrannical army captain, kills rebels and tries to protect his unborn son, at the risk of everything else.

 

20. Raging Bull – Martin Scorsese’s film about the life of boxer Jake LaMotta, a world class OCD. Starring Robert DeNiro and Joe Pesci.

Bagel Boy

So, I decided to try bagels using our FreeCycle breadmaker. All three efforts so far (onion, cinnamon raisin, rosemary) have been well received here at the TVL orifices. I found that the same 3/1 flour/water ratio has worked really well for bagels. Here is the basic recipe, to which the cook can add toppings:

• 1 cup water
• 1 (1/4-ounce) packet active dry yeast
• 1 1/2 tablespoons granulated sugar, plus 1 tablespoon
• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon olive oil
• 1 tablespoon yellow cornmeal

Directions

Combine all ingredients except cornmeal in bread machine. Select dough setting and 2 lbs. Machine will knead dough for 1/2 hour. Let rise about 1 hour or until double in size.

Remove dough and divide into 6 equal pieces. Form each piece of dough into a 4 to 6-inch log. Join the ends roll the ends together. Place on a lightly greased surface, cover with a clean cloth, and let rest until risen but not doubled in a draft-free spot, 20 to 30 minutes.

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.

Boil water. Add bagels and boil for 1 minute, flipping after 30 seconds. Bake for 5 minutes on parchment paper dusted with cornmeal. Flip and bake for an additional 1/2 hour or until nicely browned 



Light Winter Reading

The 2011 seed catalogs are coming in. Here are some early arrivals: Baker Creek, High Mowing, Stokes, Veseys, Comstock Seeds, Nichols, Dixondale Farms, Richters, Jung Seeds. The rest I had to request. As any home gardener knows, the ritual poring over each and every catalog gets you through to March. I review products I have no intention of putting in the ground - Delphiniums, anyone? Baker Creek, the current Cadillac of catalogs, sent two: one to me and one to my nom de plume. Baker Creek features all heirloom, organic seeds, some of which are unusual varieties. I still have Riesenstraube ("Giant Bunch of Grapes") tomatoes from last year that never got planted. The catalog contains excellent descriptions and photographs, and quotes from Thomas Jefferson, Ron Paul and others. This year the theme seems to be "Tomatoes from the Former Soviet Union."


I never appreciated the Jung Seed catalog - maybe it was the fact it was usually the first to arrive - but it contains many berry bushes and fruit trees, and can boast of good variety. Not everything is organic and heirloom, but everything you would want to plant is represented. I like the Nichols catalog. It is more of a booklet. Richters is a new arrival in the TVL household. The company specializes in herbs. Dixondale Farms is new as well. They specialize in onions ("We Know Onions"), and may be worth a flyer. Comstock Seeds looks like it has some of the same varieties as Baker Creek. Veseys put out their usual solid effort, with dry bean varieties you don't always see. Stokes is more of a technical catalog, with dry descriptions of product. Stokes stands out with its professional approach, and dry descriptions of product, culture and planting. It might be geared toward the professional grower. The underrated high mowing contains some unusual varieties of winter squash.


We plan to dig a third vegetable garden this year, so come March I will have the tiller out and and tearing up ground!


Hooray

Without being "tagged," aka solicited, I responded to one of those "15 ______" FB notes sending out a general query on tagees' 15 favorite whatevers. The subject was movies. As I quickly realized, 15 wasn't enough to really encompass my favorite movies. My love for Hollywood product cannot be contained! So I decided to branch out here on TVL with my top 100 or more. Feel free as I do to add your comments and thoughts.


1. JFK - Oliver Stone's absorbing take on the JFK assassination. Starring Kevin Costner, Sissy Spacek, Tommy Lee Jones, Joe Pesci. You have to love any movie that results in Congressional hearings. A political thriller of the highest order. Led to a generation of moviegoers habitually using Stone's name as a metaphor for paranoia.

2. City of God - The Brazilian GoodFellas. This film about the favelas, or slums of Rio shows why you just don't go into some neighborhoods without a police escort. A chronicle on organized crime within Rio's poorest slums, it is also a character study, narrated by a resident of those slums who explains just why it is so hard to get out.

3. 4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days - Romanian film about a young woman's attempt to obtain an illegal abortion. This is one of the best films of recent years. Despite the lurid subject matter and subtitles, you won't be able to tear yourself away or easily forget this one. The repressive Iron Curtain culture is evident from the outset as the two protags are forced underground.

4. Fargo - The Coen brothers' masterpiece, easily one of the best movies of all time. William H. Macy delivers an incredible performance as a salesman who gets in over his head when he schemes to have his own wife kidnapped for a cash ransom. Also starring Frances McDormand and Steve Buscemi. Macy got hosed out of an Oscar for this.

5. GoodFellas - Martin Scorsese's brilliant rendering of organized crime. Starring Robert DeNiro, Joe Pesci, Ray Liotta and Paul Sorvino. This is one of those films where you recite the lines for years afterward. Also, when replayed on TV, it is packaged as "Films for Guys," "Films That Don't Suck," or whatever packaging they use to describe movies about crime and guns.

6. Se7en - David Fincher's police psychodrama about a psycho who plans a series of killings based on the seven deadly sins. Police, a burned out veteran and a green newcomer, labor to find him. Without this film, there would be no Saw franchise, since the killer so cleverly makes his victims' "punishment" fit their perceived crimes. Starring Brad Pitt, Morgan Freeman and Kevin Spacey.

7. Network - A film that was far ahead of its time, predating the "infotainment" movement by 20 years. Peter Finch stars as a network anchor who has an on-air breakdown, and subsequently is peddled by the network as a messiah. Oddly relevant today no less for its predictions about mass media than for its erudite Paddy Chayefsky screenplay. Also starring William Holden, Faye Dunaway and Robert Duvall.

8. Taxi Driver - Along with GoodFellas and Raging Bull (maybe more!), one of the films Martin Scorsese got hosed out of an Oscar for. Can't imagine why. Robert DeNiro stars in the title role as Travis Bickle, a Vietnam veteran who is having problems adjusting to the urban jungle. Unforgettable from beginning to end. Also starring Jodie Foster, Cybill Shepherd and Harvey Keitel.

9. The Godfather - I have to put this one on my list or they will kick me out of the club. Not that I don't love it. Always listed as one of the top two or three movies of all time, this film takes the viewer into the insular world of organized crime, where you can get whacked for being in the wrong family. Starring Marlon Brando, Al Pacino, James Caan and Robert Duvall.

10. Sunset Boulevard - Billy Wilder directed this classic noir about a faded silent movie era starlet and a failing screenwriter, and the Hollywood that is leaving them behind. Starring William Holden and Gloria Swanson, this film was ahead of its time in its use of post-mortem voice-over narration and in its indictment of Hollywood. Still resonates today, mostly. I love it.

Seeds & Stems

I'm Not Allowed To Blog About This

Yesterday I had occasion to sample the catering truck cuisine of For Stars Catering during a movie shoot. Mr. VegLaw loves the movies, as we all know. The good people from Hollywood ("Which studio?" "A major one.") hired FSC to cater on the set. The food I had was delicious and there was plenty of everything. And yes, the caterers were veggie-friendly. I don't know why Hollywood caterers play to the vegetarians. It's mostly Teamsters, low-level crew and extras eating it. Several of us extras had to explain to a 38-year-old man what capers are. No one could. He picked them off his veal piccata individually. Another extra asked me what veal is. I told her it is BABY COW! She ate it and, apparently, enjoyed it. The only Hollywood veal reference I can hear without getting squirmy appears in The Godfather ...

FSC owns a large, industrial strength juicer with pre-cut veggies laid out on a platter. So although I had eaten already that morning, I juiced some beets, celery, apple and carrot and drank the results. Though I have a Juiceman at home, I never bothered with beets and celery. It was delicious! The pulp is shot through a drier vent to an unseen receptacle.

Bonus: I got to watch them "water" a street with a tanker truck. It looks better on film...

If You Must

Interesting article on the grass-fed vs. grain fed debate. I like how the author compares the effect on the stomach of a cow on grain to that of an all-donut diet on the stomach of a human.

 

The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Yesterday, with my niece visiting and assisting, I picked more celery, leeks, beets, lettuce and swiss chard from the garden.